30 things that I love about having Multiple Sclerosis...
1. Vertigo and Vestibular Ataxia - I get to pretend that I am on a Trans-Atlantic sea cruise every day...plus I like wearing Hawaiian shirts.
2. Disabling Fatigue - I get to take naps and snuggle with my 3 year old son.
3. Insomnia I get to listen to the National Anthem once the infomercials have ended....life can stick me with a crippling disease but it can not stop my patriotism.
4. Heat Intolerance - I get to drink all the Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes I want.
5. Nausea and Vomiting - I can drink all the Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes I want with no weight gain.
6. Short-term Memory Loss - I get to walk into the same room over and over several times until I remember why I went in there to begin with...it is a great excuse to just go make another Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shake.
7. Delayed Verbal Processing Nothing stops you from putting your foot in your mouth faster than being unable to think of what you were just about to say...several times in a row.
8. Cognitive Dysfunction - When I put my cell phone in the refrigerator, my car keys in the microwave, and the milk in the dishwasher I am always pleasantly surprised when I find them.
9. Respiratory Dysfunction - I can get out of bed and feel like I just completed my old work out routine...all without sweating!
10. Uhthoff's Syndrome - I'll get to wear kick-** self contained water cooled clothing like an INDY500 driver when I go outside in the heat.
11. Dysdiadochokinesia - I now have a REAL excuse for not being able to play guitar like Dimebag Darrell.
12. Speech Ataxia - I never know what funky new words I may create when I talk. I believe this is how "jive talking" and Esperanto started.
13. Paraesthesia - It reminds me of when I was 10 years old at summer camp when I stuffed my socks full of Pop Rocks on a dare.
14. Dysarthria - I can now do great Bob Dylan impressions!
15. Footdrop - It makes it really easy to plant even rows of seed for gardening.
16. Diplopia - Getting to see my beautiful wife and son twice at the same time is awesome.
17. Optic Neuritis - The ugly people on my High Def TV are finally blurry! W00H000!!!!
18. Dysmetria You get to figure out brand new innovative ways to do simple things like cutting vegetables or frying bacon....or putting on pants while frying bacon.
19. Muscle Paresis - I will no longer feel obligated to help friends if they ever need to move a couch up a flight of stairs or bury a body in the Meadowlands.
20. Muscle Spasticity - Gym membership? Ha! Look at these quads!
21. Sexual Dysfunction - It is so much cheaper than condoms.
22. Bladder Spasticity - You will always know where all the rest rooms are located.
23. Night Blindness - Driving at night and walking the dogs in the dark is more exciting now!
24. Dysphagia - You get to take your time and enjoy the taste in every bite of your meals before you swallow...sometimes for an hour!
25. Dystonia - I was never a fan of typing words correctly anyway...just ask my online chat buddies.
26. Gate Ataxia - I have an excuse to finally buy the same cane as my favorite antisocial TV character, Dr. House...we are so alike now that it is frightening.
27. Unpredictable Flare-Ups You finally learn to take and plan for just one day at a time because no one knows what tomorrow brings...or if you will even be able to get out of bed.
28. Clumsiness I used to just be good to look at but now I am much more fun to watch.
29. Hot and Cold Flashes I get to be secure in my masculinity knowing that while I may never be able to know the joys of child birth...I can however share in the experience of menopause.
30. Likelihood I will be stuck in a motorized wheel chair eventually I have another reason to keep working on designing the first ever low-rider turbo charged Rascal Scooter for street racing and an Arduino based 4 axis motion controlled multiphase exoskeleton with death ray for use with the idiots who park in handicapped spots.
Hope I made at least one of my fellow MSers smile
2. Disabling Fatigue - I get to take naps and snuggle with my 3 year old son.
3. Insomnia I get to listen to the National Anthem once the infomercials have ended....life can stick me with a crippling disease but it can not stop my patriotism.
4. Heat Intolerance - I get to drink all the Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes I want.
5. Nausea and Vomiting - I can drink all the Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shakes I want with no weight gain.
6. Short-term Memory Loss - I get to walk into the same room over and over several times until I remember why I went in there to begin with...it is a great excuse to just go make another Peanut Butter Espresso Chocolate Ice Cream Shake.
7. Delayed Verbal Processing Nothing stops you from putting your foot in your mouth faster than being unable to think of what you were just about to say...several times in a row.
8. Cognitive Dysfunction - When I put my cell phone in the refrigerator, my car keys in the microwave, and the milk in the dishwasher I am always pleasantly surprised when I find them.
9. Respiratory Dysfunction - I can get out of bed and feel like I just completed my old work out routine...all without sweating!
10. Uhthoff's Syndrome - I'll get to wear kick-** self contained water cooled clothing like an INDY500 driver when I go outside in the heat.
11. Dysdiadochokinesia - I now have a REAL excuse for not being able to play guitar like Dimebag Darrell.
12. Speech Ataxia - I never know what funky new words I may create when I talk. I believe this is how "jive talking" and Esperanto started.
13. Paraesthesia - It reminds me of when I was 10 years old at summer camp when I stuffed my socks full of Pop Rocks on a dare.
14. Dysarthria - I can now do great Bob Dylan impressions!
15. Footdrop - It makes it really easy to plant even rows of seed for gardening.
16. Diplopia - Getting to see my beautiful wife and son twice at the same time is awesome.
17. Optic Neuritis - The ugly people on my High Def TV are finally blurry! W00H000!!!!
18. Dysmetria You get to figure out brand new innovative ways to do simple things like cutting vegetables or frying bacon....or putting on pants while frying bacon.
19. Muscle Paresis - I will no longer feel obligated to help friends if they ever need to move a couch up a flight of stairs or bury a body in the Meadowlands.
20. Muscle Spasticity - Gym membership? Ha! Look at these quads!
21. Sexual Dysfunction - It is so much cheaper than condoms.
22. Bladder Spasticity - You will always know where all the rest rooms are located.
23. Night Blindness - Driving at night and walking the dogs in the dark is more exciting now!
24. Dysphagia - You get to take your time and enjoy the taste in every bite of your meals before you swallow...sometimes for an hour!
25. Dystonia - I was never a fan of typing words correctly anyway...just ask my online chat buddies.
26. Gate Ataxia - I have an excuse to finally buy the same cane as my favorite antisocial TV character, Dr. House...we are so alike now that it is frightening.
27. Unpredictable Flare-Ups You finally learn to take and plan for just one day at a time because no one knows what tomorrow brings...or if you will even be able to get out of bed.
28. Clumsiness I used to just be good to look at but now I am much more fun to watch.
29. Hot and Cold Flashes I get to be secure in my masculinity knowing that while I may never be able to know the joys of child birth...I can however share in the experience of menopause.
30. Likelihood I will be stuck in a motorized wheel chair eventually I have another reason to keep working on designing the first ever low-rider turbo charged Rascal Scooter for street racing and an Arduino based 4 axis motion controlled multiphase exoskeleton with death ray for use with the idiots who park in handicapped spots.
Hope I made at least one of my fellow MSers smile
but i'm shaking all over to keep the giggles in and not wake up my husband!
and the Beast
of Depression. 
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