trying to stay sane and not whine

[smartipants]

hi. just diagnosed on 02/14. up until mid-december, i seemed fine. then numb left lip and eyebrow...then numb left leg...now i'm on my second round of solu-medrol because of sight issues and just worked through the tritration for avonex. doc thinks meds are not going to be strong enough.

my husband is great and my kids are coping okay. they have never seen me sick before (let alone self-injecting and removing steroid picc lines). despite the roadblocks, i want to say that this is not who i am. but there are days i feel i am being swallowed up by this nonsense.

is it normal to feel like your life is unraveling? does the road even out a bit? i dream i am well and wake up to reality. i know i am very lucky that i can still work. and hoping some of my insanity is the meds. how do you bring normalcy to madness? my dreams have to be re-worked, but i want to spend the last half of my life as happy(ish) as the first half has been. not always perfect, but focused on others and not myself. peace to my new friends.

** Moderator's note - Post broken into paragraphs for easier reading. Many people with MS have visual difficulties that prevent them from reading large blocks of print. **

[Seasha]

Hi smartipants and welcome to MSWorld! It's nice to meet you and we hope you find friends, comfort and great information here. It's great that your husband is good support for you right now, the kids are OK and you are still working. We too can offer you support here anytime as we understand what it's like - especially being newly diagnosed!

It is completely normal to feel what you're feeling! We have (and are) traveling that road too. Sometimes the emotions are shock, grief, anger, frustration, you name it - and it's all right to feel those feelings.

As to the road ahead, it will smooth out, but I am a realist here and need to let you know there might be more speed bumps ahead. You seem like you have a great attitude and that will carry you far!

I wish you well on your journey! Please feel comfortable asking lots of questions or making comments and come back often!

[abeautifullife]

Welcome! I was also diagnosed recently, at the beginning of March officially, but the MRI came back positive for MS in February. I am so sorry that you haven't been feeling well and hope that the steroids do their job quickly and leave you feeling better.

A few things that have really helped me thus far, to establish a little bit of normal: my new approach to life and, by extension MS, is "don't create problems where there aren't any." Don't seek out the negative if you don't have to. Find positive people who support you. I've found a great community of MSers (of various abilities) who work out together and have incredibly positive outlooks on the condition. Their support rejuvenates me.

I also am in the process of memorizing a hymn that comforts me when I feel overwhelmed. It's called "How Can I Keep From Singing?" and it is about coping with adversity by focusing on all the gifts you've been given. It's my mantra now. You could select something similar - it wouldn't have to be religious in nature, just something that makes you feel good.

I think that these things have helped me to re-establish normalcy in my life. It's so tempting, especially here, to click on a thousand threads that have terrifying titles, but they only drive you crazy. Focus on hope right now, I promise it will get you farther!

[MikeonABike]

Just keep moving !

Smartipants,

Welcome to the forum. Hopefully you will find lots of support here. Well, since being DX in 2010, I have learned that after accepting the realities of life with MS, I will never let it stop me from moving on in life. I have traveled to the Bahamas, Aruba, Italy & Spain in the past few years, I take my cane and get thru airports and passport checks with ease because they will allow me to use their wheelchair. I can't walk far or run, but since being DX, my wife decided to learn to run 5k races and marathons. I can't run, but I can still ride a bike (carefully) so now I help train her and a group of local runners with a national running organization (Fleet Feet). They ask me to ride along with an AED on my back and just encourage the runners. On April 20th, our area is having it's anual MS Walk so I picked up the information to show my wife. She got so excited that she started a team and now has about 75 folks (mostly runners who I have encouraged) participating (she has already raised ove $3k).

I say this because I have always been very active and refuse to let this disease still my life away. I am always looking at ways to manage around my difficulties. I have just been fitted for a new AFO and it now helps me walk a mile. I plan to get a walkaide next and also have committed to walking a mile at the MS Walk to show my appreciation for support.

I am encouraging you to keep moving and make up in your mind to not let MS stop you even if you start to move slower....

Hope this helps

[JerryD]

Hi smarti,
I don't know how others keep their sanity. I am having a really hard time, mentally and emotionally. This is not a pleasant thing to endure, but endure we must. I wish you well. Good luck